Mom-Centric Advocacy

I  know I am missing some supports/ providers from this list. What am I missing??? 

Also, is it just me, or does the support focus 98% on the child in question, not supports for the caregivers? 

*sigh*

Letting Go of 2012 - Part 1

Some photography forums I belong to asked what our favorite photo of 2012 was.

It started me thinking and looking back at the year. It was a roller coaster of one for sure, many changes in my life. But I saw this one and I can't say it's my favorite but it maybe the most meaningful photo I took this year.

But hard for me to look at still.

My biological father died in May. His wife, ex-wife,  four step daughters and me (his only biological child, but I was not raised by him) were with him his final week of life and when he passed on.

It was the first time all of us had been together. EVER. We connected, healed and grew through this terrible process.

Hours after he passed in the middle of the early morning, we went down with one sky lantern to the beach, in front of the rental condo where we had been caring for him, and sent that light into the night and watched it burn and disappear.

Then we went  together, under the moon, into the still, cold, cleansing water, to try and find relief or peace or maybe just freedom from the heaviness of it all.

The profoundness of that day carries on. In so many ways, some terrible and some amazing. My life is forever changed. Again.

This was 2012 for me. This feels too personal to share...  But it's the sharing that helps me move on. So I will.

The Dog Days ARE Over

Wow, it's been a long summer.  I just looked back and realized my last post was on April 28th. The very next day was Silly dilly's 7th birthday, and also the day that I got the call that my Father wasn't going to make it.

He'd been in the hospital for 6 weeks, getting worse, without real answers. This was the day his wife called me to tell me that they had answers, and he only had a short time left. Cancer, as it does, had ravaged him. I was on the plane that night.

I was blessed to have almost a week, along side my step-sisters and their moms, to care for him and get closure. To be there the moment he passed. It is a curse and a blessing to be a part of moments that profound. It is a gift.

(okay, deep breath, whew)

So, since there has been so many changes in my life. Some wonderful and some horrible. My dear, poor children definitely made the most sacrifice and didn't see me much. I was traveling and working so much, their wonderful father took great care of them.

But kids miss their moms... it can't be helped.

Now I am home again, refocusing on the most important job I ever had, my kids well being.

The Bigs started back to school, and for Wild Man that meant kindergarten!!!

It's a revelation! But it's also a terrifying challenge to get it right. He has an outdated IEP and two wonderful teachers, and we're just beginning, so I am staying open minded and optimistic. I know that his feelings about school are being developed through this process and I NEED him to have positive feelings.

All my kids have their own "special" needs, like all children. I understand now how some parents choose to "stay home" for their kids. As a working parent, I never really got it until now.

So, it's time to shake the etch-a-sketch and refocus on them, make sure they are getting the support they need, make sure they aren't slipping through the cracks, make sure they feel loved and secure.

It's a big job, but somebody HAS to do it.

Another curse and blessing rolled into one. Another gift. Thank GOD for the cycle of life that gives us this much hope.

10 weird things about me

1. I cry, but not always at the right time.

2. I have anxiety about coupons and box tops.

3. I hate seeing dirty dishes, but hate touching them more.

4. I hide from social events so that I don't have to worry about how     I will act or what I will say and then regret.

5. I hate the phone.

6. I have vivid dreams all the time, If I wake up in one, I will remember it forever.

7. I have lots of odd memories, like sitcom episodes I didn't get to see the end of. There is an episode of silver spoons that pops into mind regularly.

8. However, I have terrible short term memory. I can't recall a phone number to save my life.

9. I like orange juice but not eating oranges, I like eating apples but     not drinking apple juice.

10. I love my kids completely, but they are difficult for me to be around all day. I think they need breaks from me as well.


Everyone is unique, Right? What do you do that you think is "weird"? Perhaps we should celebrate our "weirdness"  :)